Washington D.C. – If 2024 was the year of hype, then 2025 is the year of humiliation for Elon Musk. And by the looks of it, it’s only getting worse.
Once heralded as a genius, a reformer, and the world’s richest social media poster, Musk has spent the past twelve months stumbling through one disaster after another. From boardroom drama to federal probes, Musk’s empire has begun to rot—loudly, publicly, and in real time.
It all started with DOGE, a fiscal watchdog initiative co-founded by Musk and fellow anti-spending advocate Vivek Ramaswamy. But barely a month in, Musk reportedly had Ramaswamy removed from the group—calling him “too ugly (i.e. too brown) for the new club” and demanding a more photogenic replacement. The public backlash was immediate. The press dubbed it “Welfare Barbie vs. the Bean Counter.”
DOGE’s mission? Root out $2 trillion in wasteful government spending. But after six months, Musk’s investigation turned up a measly $5.37 in unaccounted expenses—a rogue vending machine charge in the Department of Defense. The discovery was quietly dismissed. The promise of mass accountability vanished overnight.
Things only spiraled further. Musk’s right-hand man—known only as “Big Balls”—was hospitalized after allegedly trying to play “Captain Save A Hoe”, caught in a personal affair gone very wrong. Not long after, Musk himself was reportedly assaulted inside the White House, leaving him with a black eye and a swollen lip.
The attacker remains unnamed, but sources inside the Trump Regime claimed Musk was warned “not to come back.”
That warning became official when Musk was ejected from the White House entirely—a first in US history. Not since the days of security clearance scandals and shredded memos has someone been physically removed from the premises.
Since then, the fall has been swift:
• Musk’s EV credits—a lucrative loophole for pocketing green subsidies—were revoked. • Tesla’s sales plummeted -71% in North America and -85% globally. • SpaceX can’t source materials, grounding multiple launches. • Twitter suffered a -69% user drop, as even trolls abandoned ship. • And a few weeks ago, Tesla paid out a record $300 million to settle a wrongful death lawsuit involving a fatal autopilot crash.
Despite collapsing stock prices, public humiliation, and an unceremonious removal from the White House, Musk remained publicly upbeat.
“The universe is working in my favor,” he told followers just days ago. “Everything is perfect. Everything is aligned.”
But then came the dreadful knock.
The Downfall
At precisely 03:30 on a quiet Saturday morning, The FBI rolled up deep to Musk’s sprawling compound. Sixty-five federal agents surrounded the property, armed with an arrest warrant bearing his name.
The billionaire, once considered untouchable, reportedly stood frozen as agents announced their purpose.
Even Musk’s high-powered legal team appeared stunned. One source close to the situation said, “His lawyer asked if it was a prank. Then they saw the badge.”
Within minutes, Musk was in handcuffs, seated in the back of a black government-issued cruiser, his slippers still on, phone confiscated, press team silent.